Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Stoo's LiveJournal:

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Thursday, August 11th, 2005
1:01 am	Life Oh why cant I be what you need a new improved version of me but i'm nothing so good no i'm nothing just bones, a lonely ghost burning down songs of violence of love and of sorrow i beg for just one more tomorrow where you hold me down fold me in deep deep deep in the heart of your sins I break in two over you I break in two And each piece of me dies And only you can give the breath of life But you dont see me, you dont... here i'm in between darkness and light bleached and blinded by these nights where im tossing and tortured til dawn by you, visions of you then youre gone the shock lifts the red from my face when i hear someone's taking my place how could love be so thoughtless, so cruel when all, all that i did was for you i break in two over you i break in two and each piece of me dies and only you can give the breath of life but you dont see me you dont.. i break in two over you i break in two and each piece of me dies and only you can give the breath of life but you dont see me you don't... i break in two over you i break in two over you, over you i break in two i would break in two for you now you see me now you don't now you need me now you don't Current Music: FATA (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, November 24th, 2004
11:04 pm	Hehe This is quite funny as regard the 7 people on here I know! :D </td></tr> My LiveJournal 12 Days My True Love gave to me... 12 missyoshis a-staring. 11 mslazaruss a-bowing. 10 explodingdogrsss a-grinding. 9 atomsmashers a-laying. 8 deanforamericas a-skipping. 7 spamsmolytics a-listening. 6 memepools a-bouncing. 5 amethyst mangofandangos. 4 galloping metalshezs. 3 Japanese officialgaimans. 2 dog jaunteees. And a duracellbunny in a banana tree. Get gifts! Username: Another fun meme brought to you by rfreebern. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Sunday, November 14th, 2004
6:20 pm	This makes sense... Advanced Big 45 Personality Test Results Gregariousness ||||||||| 26% Sociability ||||||||||||||||||||| 62% Assertiveness ||||||||||||||| 50% Poise |||||||||||| 38% Leadership ||||||||||||||| 42% Provocativeness ||||||||||||||| 42% Self-Disclosure |||||||||||||||||| 54% Talkativeness |||||||||||||||||| 54% Group Attachment ||||||||||||||| 50% Extroversion ||||||||||||||| 46% Understanding ||||||||||||||||||||| 70% Warmth ||||||||||||||||||||| 62% Morality ||||||||||||||||||||| 66% Pleasantness ||||||||||||||| 50% Empathy ||||||||||||||||||||| 62% Cooperation |||||||||||||||||||||||| 74% Sympathy ||||||||||||||||||||| 70% Tenderness ||||||||||||||||||||| 70% Nurturance |||||||||||||||||||||||| 74% Friendliness ||||||||||||||||||||| 66% Conscientiousness ||||||||||||||||||||| 62% Efficiency ||||||||||||||| 50% Dutifulness ||||||||||||||||||||| 66% Purposefulness ||||||||||||||| 42% Organization ||||||||||||||||||||| 70% Cautiousness ||||||||| 26% Rationality |||||||||||||||||| 58% Perfectionism |||||||||||||||||||||||| 78% Orderliness ||||||||||||||||||||| 66% Orderliness |||||||||||||||||| 57% Stability ||||||||| 22% Happiness |||||||||||| 34% Calmness |||||||||||| 38% Moderation ||||||||| 30% Toughness ||||||||| 26% Impulse Control ||||||||||||||| 46% Imperturbability |||||| 14% Cool-headedness ||||||||||||||| 46% Tranquility ||||||||||||||| 42% Emotional Stability |||||||||||| 33% Intellect |||||||||||||||||||||||| 74% Ingenuity |||||||||||||||||| 54% Reflection ||||||||||||||||||||| 70% Competence ||||||||||||||||||||| 66% Quickness |||||||||||||||||| 58% Introspection ||||||||||||||||||||| 62% Creativity ||||||||||||||| 50% Imagination ||||||||||||||||||||| 66% Depth ||||||||||||||||||||| 70% Openmindedness ||||||||||||||||||||| 63% Take Free Advanced Big 45 Personality Test personality tests by similarminds.com (2 Comments |Comment on this)
4:11 pm	So it's not all bad... Well, depite being in an almost constant state of depression these days, this was sent to my shop the other day, and for the 1st time in ages I smiled a genuine smile! ------------------------------------------------------------------------ To: Bangor/Stores/UK/gamestation@gamestation From: Sarah Samworth/Webmasters/UK/gamestation Date: 11/10/2004 02:59PM Subject: Fw: Enquiry Thought this might interest you, congratulations on one particularly happy customer! I've forwarded the email on to customer services too. Sarah Web Admin Gamestation ----- Forwarded by Sarah Samworth/Webmasters/UK/gamestation on 10/11/2004 14:57 ----- "Philippa Tranter" <********@yahoo.co.uk> 08/11/2004 21:50 To "enquiries@gamestation.co.uk" <enquiries@gamestation.co.uk> cc Subject Enquiry A user has made an enquiry : Name: Philippa Tranter Email: *******@yahoo.co.uk Enquiry: Dear sir I would just like to congratulate you on your wonderful staff at the bangor shop in North wales, i am a customer services trainer, and i have yet to be disapointed by your staff, always very friendly, no problem to big or to small to deal with, and always served with a smile... if you have an award for best shop or best staff then this is a must for it. Please pass on my comments to the staff there. many thanks Philippa Tranter ------------------------------------------------- Nice eh :) It's always good to be appreciated! Current Mood: cold (Comment on this)
Thursday, October 14th, 2004
7:18 pm	Ouch! Ow ow ow... I feel like a fucking voodoo doll! I go for an Asthma check up and they jab my left arm with a flu jab and my right arm with a pneumonia jab... I only wanted new inhalers :( Which I forgot to collect from Boots in the end! Oops! So now I'm walking around looking like the living dead with my arms swinging limply by my sides... huzzah! Hope I feel better for 36 Crazyfists tomorrow!! Tonight however I'm going to some Fetish night thing for some haggard reason... think it'll be quite funny... apparently it's 50p entry if you go dressed up... but it's only a pound to go normal! I think I'll sacrifice the extra 50p just to laugh at some of Bangor's 'wackier' losers :D Current Mood: sore Current Music: Rammstein - Reise Reise (Comment on this)
Saturday, October 9th, 2004
3:30 pm	W00t Oh yeah! I have tix for 36 Crazyfists next Friday in Liverpool :) *bounce* (Comment on this)
Tuesday, October 5th, 2004
9:26 pm	Every time I see her sad, I die a little inside. So yeah, hey. S'been a while! How is everyone? Well, I'm stretched to my limits these days and I'm not far from snapping... I mean, I'm sat at my PC *crying* and I can't for the life of me think of a decent reason why!! So what's happened since last I graced these pages? Well, I got manager at the shop, which anyone would think was pretty cool, except that I don't have an assistant manager, I'm understaffed, and the only other person who knew vaguely how to open and close has now quit! As such I've had a 14 day straight stint followed by a couple of days off, and now I'm on my 8th consecutive day without a break... that alone is enough to tear my sanity apart, although me and Rachel had a teary conversation the other night about how I destroyed everything 18 months ago just as she was falling for me... I *need* stability right now and I wish I could turn back time. Things may not have been how I wanted them then, but in hindsight I want what I could have had then *now*... but it's gone forever and I can't fucking take this... I need an emotional life-belt right now 'cuz I'm drowning fast here... Am I really this horrible a person that no one wants to be around or with? I feel ostracised from most of the people I was once close to, I find it hard to hold a conversation these days. I know I've made mistakes and I know I've been horrible, but no amount of "I'm sorry"s can make anything better. I find it so hard to admit I was wrong so many times, and how I let people play me like a fucking puppet sometimes, but I know deep down that I've screwed up and I've been screwed around through my own stupidity. I'm such a fucking loser sometimes. I need time off, I need time away... I need to not be here now. Current Mood: sick (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, July 28th, 2004
10:48 pm	Observe... Also... I've learned to cook fantastic Chinese meals! Whaddya think? (2 Comments |Comment on this)
10:28 pm	How to make a band You've gotta love camera phones! Without my 7600 this post wouldn't have happened... Last Monday at work was a rather quiet day... so me and Dave in the shop decided to form a band! ( Read more... ) Current Mood: creative Current Music: Blink 182 - I'm Lost Without You (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, July 26th, 2004
10:06 pm	Desperate times Ahh yes... the end of the month. The time when I'm practically penniless... And we've run out of toilet roll in the house. I'll be pinching some from work tomorrow then. In the meantime my ass is getting the kitchen paper treatment, although that's better than my dumb ass housemate who didn't ask if there was *any* kinda paper around and decided to use the specially formulated Mr Muscle anti-bacterial toilet wipes to 'finish the job' Retard! (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, July 19th, 2004
11:27 pm	Burning the candle at both ends... I'm so worn out at the moment... but I only really have myself to blame :D Friday before last after work my friend Ella texted me to tell me to come to Manchester for the Rockworld all-nighter... So I said I'd see if I could afford it... amazingly the bank let me have 40 squid and that was that! A sign! I grabbed my other friend Zena from the pub on the way and got the 8pm train... It was a very good night but I wish I hadn't had to be back in work at 12pm the following afternoon (I'm just glad John gave me the morning off to have a couple of hours kip!!) Every night this last week I've been out with friends either at the pub or at house parties and I've met some cool new people too! Then this Friday I went off to the pub after work and Mark grabbed me and said he was off to Krazy House in Liverpool, coming back the same night, and if I wanted to come along... 2 pund entry and 50p a bottle on Carlsberg? How could I refuse!? Again work followed at 9am Saturday, but what the hell! Saturday night was my mate Lee's graduation party which was a tad more subdued but no less intoxicating! That only lasted 'till about 1am, but I sat up 'till 4am at my mums place chatting to her about life, the universe and everything and watching her and my step-dad's wedding video 'cuz it was their 11th anniversery... I love my folks to bits, I really do think I'm lucky to be so close to 'em. So yeh... very tired right now despite 2 days off! Back to slogging my guts out again tomorrow though... On the love life front... well, I'm still a sad, lonely bunny... but again I only have myself to blame. I keep wallowing in my own self-pity and I totally fail to see that there are other people interested 'till it's too late... I've so far been chatting to a girl in Rockworld, a girl in Krazy House and two girls in Bangor who in hindsight were blatantly quite interested... but being my stupid shy self, I settled for a friendly chat! *DOH* One of them even came up to me and said she thought I was cute... and she was fucking gorgeous! Aaaaaaaaaagh! Slap me please! Fortunately, one of the girls in Bangor has apparently told my friend Chris that she'd like to meet up with me again some time... so Chris is being my go-between there :) Fingers crossed eh! Meanwhile, as regards Rachel... she's off in Shetland at the moment doing some conservation stuff. I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss her, but at the same time, I'm enjoying the space... there's so much tension when we're around eachother sometimes. The big thing that pisses me off about her at the moment is something that several people have mentioned recently... she seems to have an 'I don't want him right now, but no one else can have him' attitude that got pointed out to me when I was spending some time haning around with my other housemate Fee... she got very tetchy one night when we were in the pub together and a friend of ours suggested that! She also keeps acting quite flirty sometimes which I'm not sure if it's just the way she is, or if perhaps she's trying to keep me sweet... well I've made up my mind and I shan't be waiting for her to come around. Her loss. I did get a postcard from her the other day which was nice... then she phoned me in the afternoon from the only place in Shetland that she could get a signal... I told her about how much fun I was having going around all these clubs and meeting these new people (Obviously missing out certain bits about how I only got talking to these girls and nothing else ;) ) At the end of the conversation she asked me to water her plants while she was gone, I said OK but I wasn't going to be home to do it 'till after the weekend, to which she sounded suprised and asked where I was going to... 'Wouldn't you like to know' I replied despite knowing I was only visiting my parents and friends back at home. She answered in a dissapointed voice words to the effect of 'oh, how come you're having all this fun without me' at which point I made my excuse to finish the conversation with the usual 'battery's dying' spiel :) There is life after Rachel, and I'm gonna make damned sure she knows that I know that! (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, July 14th, 2004
4:45 pm	'Lo Hi folks! I've finally got my internet connection back, albeit 56k for the week 'till my broadband gets reconnected! I'm all settled in my new house now, and it's a very funky place! Plenty of space for all my sci-fi toys and consoles :D Ummm... for having been away for a month and a half, I really don't have very much to talk about! I've just been working my ass off far too much! Ahh well, so far all my hard work has payed off and hopefully within 6 months I could be going for manager... Also, I've recently realised that there is life after (Insert certain ex g/f's name in here) and not all women hate me! Hurrah! Although, due to my ineptitude and general shyness I only actually managed to get talking to 2 girls who in hindsight (And after a slap from my mates) very blatently interested! Ok, so I suck... Anyway... I'm gonna go get ready for a game of footie now! *gasp* I know... the thought of me playing footie!! But we've got a 5-a-side game coming up in an hour or so, Gamestation Vs Blockbuster... should be interesting. We've already played 2 games, one against GAME who we beat 9-6 and one against AllSports which we lost 3-1. It's all to play for here!! (Comment on this)
Sunday, June 6th, 2004
2:20 pm	Gone gone without a trace Well, as of 3pm today I shall be leaving Number 58 Caellepa in favour of pastures greener... or 11 Orme Road as it's more commonly known... As such, I won't be able to get online properly for quite a while, so it's on this not that a bid you all farewell and I'll probably update again when I'm all settled in and have photos of the new house :) (Comment on this)
Friday, June 4th, 2004
11:05 pm	I got my new phone today... it's a Nokia 7600... it's very flash, with inbuilt camera and video and the ability to send video messages... but I can't for the life of me figure it out!!! I got it sim unlocked and switched the 3G sim for my existing O2 sim, but that won't let me do any GPRS or MMS stuff... and I have no idea how to set it up in order to do so!!! Heeeeeeeeeeeeelp! (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, June 2nd, 2004
1:55 pm	Tiny Voices 'just seen yer little poll in jan's posting hot or not. sorry buddy but have to say no. mind you the whole guys thing aint me' says one anonymous user... oh well, everyone's entitled to their opinion I suppose... here in follows the opinions of 533 other people... HOT or NOT 9.5 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 534 votes Rate me! Our survey says... you're 94% wrong :p (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, June 1st, 2004
9:15 am	What the hell am I doing up at 9.15am on my day off?! I'm losing my voice at the moment... this sucks! I'm going back to bed... (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, May 31st, 2004
12:57 am	Flash.... ahaaaaaaaaaa.... So tonight me and my mates Tim and Dan went out dressed up in full suit and tie, and if I may say so myself, I scrub up rather well... Or in other words, I look fucking fine in a suit! :D Right now I'm just a tad pissed and singing along to Me First And The Gimmie Gimmies 'Where Do Broken Hearts Go' and loving it!!! I spent half an hour on the phone to Rachel earlier, and we spoke like the closest friends which is something I never want us to lose! Even if I'm never with her again, we do have a 'connection' and our friendship is something I never want us to lose... So on the whole, tonight has been absolutely hillarious and generally good for just leveling shit out... Now the big decision is, should I play Ninja Gaiden a bit more or should I go to sleep??!?!?! Fudk :D:D (Comment on this)
Sunday, May 30th, 2004
5:05 pm	Oops... I did a silly thing today... I went to Burtons to buy a couple of the cheap funkeh bracelets that they have in there and the guy asked if I had a Burtons card to get 10% off, I said I didn't and he asked me if I'd like to sign up for one... Now I assumed it was like a customer loyalty card or some-such, like a GAME card or old MVC cards... but it's bloody not is it, it's a ruddy credit card! And I didn't twig untill I'd filled in the form and he said he was about to ring it through against my credit rating to see if it was eligble (At this point I started reading the small print and realised what I was doing) But me being a numpty (And not wanting to look like a complete tool) didn't say 'Woah, hold up... never mind', noooooooooooo, I just let him carry on... Strangely enough it turns out I *am* eligble for one (Which is weird seeing as I thought I'd have a pretty bad standing with people like that seeing as I owe Lloyds TSB 2K somewhere along the line!) and now there's a credit card winging it's way towards me! :S Erk! I think I might seal it in concrete and dump it in the sea for safe keeping! In other news, I made myself look like a tit at work today by sending a big apologetic e-mail to Runcorn 'cuz I thought I was 15 minutes late sending them an e-mail, when infact it was 45 minutes before the deadline! Ach! Where the hell did I lose an hour? It's like 5.15pm now and for some reason I didn't click untill just now that I should still have 15 minutes before they want the damned figures! LMAO :D (Comment on this)
Wednesday, May 26th, 2004
6:42 pm	Falling Down The other day I bought Falling Down on DVD the other day for a tenner, and god, I think it's my new favourite film! Although I can kinda scarily relate far too much with Michael Douglas's character... I think I'm far too similar actually... The guy had the best intentions but a short fuse and nothing he ever did seemed to work out, and it scared me how I could be seen as that kind of person! The smallest things have made me do the stupidest things, and I hate my short temper and stupid petty jealousy 'cuz it's hurting me and those closest too me. So to anyone I've angered, pissed off, upset, annoyed, irritated or wound up in the last couple of years when this side of me became more predominent, I'm really very sorry. Is there any way to supress the more horrible emotions that people 'suffer' from? (Comment on this)
Saturday, May 22nd, 2004
9:38 pm	So long... so painful 21 year and 9 months on this earth and right now I don't want to spend another minute on it... (7 Comments |Comment on this)